A Price To Pay For Heroes
by Verdreht
Summary: Duke's not the heroic sort. Or, at least, he didn't used to be. Lately, though...he's begun to learn things he never knew. He's started to learn about himself, and now, he's about to learn that there's a price to pay for heroes. Nathan/Duke SLASH Nuke
1. Chapter 1

Badge be damned, Nathan broke at least twenty traffic laws as he sped towards the church. He'd only gotten the call a couple of minutes ago, and he was already less than five minutes away from his destination. Even that was too long, though; a second would be too long for this.

He and Audrey had been investigating what looked to be another Troubled suspect in a series of assaults and murders. The particular oddity with this case had been that it was mostly known Troubled citizens being targeted; two of the six weren't on Nathan's late father's list, but he wasn't conceited or stupid enough to think that meant they couldn't be Troubled. Each and every one of them had been beaten to death, but all the injuries, though clearly done by hand, had been way more than any human should've been able to do. A Troubled attacking Troubleds. Because Haven wasn't complicated enough as it way.

He'd been investigating another lead that Vince and Dave had steered him towards when he'd gotten the call. Audrey had decided to go down to speak to Reverend Driscoll about everything. After all, it was no secret that the Reverend had it out for Haven's…special citizens. Neither had seemed like they'd be particularly dangerous, but Duke had decided to go with Audrey anyway. Nathan had thought, at the time, it was just because his boyfriend got bored too easily.

Now, though, he couldn't help wondering if Duke wasn't Troubled in some way, too, because he seemed to have an unnatural ability to sniff out trouble in even the most menial of tasks. Case and point: he'd only just finished interviewing a supposed witness – a bust, but the way – when his phone started going off. It was Audrey.

While she hadn't had a lot of time, apparently, to articulate, she'd gotten her point across very clearly. The suspect was there at the church and raising his own brand of Cain. She and Duke were in trouble, and they needed back up.

Thus the twenty miles he was going over the speed limit as he sped down the streets of Haven in his Bronco. Luckily, it was a Sunday morning, so most everyone was in church. Well, luckily in that the streets were clear. He imagined it would make confronting the suspect a whole lot trickier.

As soon as he reached the church, Nathan slammed his truck into park and leaped out, pulling his gun from its holster. Already, he could hear panicked cries, and he forced his long legs to run faster around to the back of the church where all the noise was coming from.

What he saw when he rounded the corner, was a sight he knew he would see in nightmares for years to come.

Standing in the middle of the cemetery behind the church was a massive man, taller than Nathan and easily two or three times his bulk. The man was bald, and tattoos stretched across most of the skin not covered by his muscle shirt and jeans. One of his arms was outstretched, showing off biceps bigger around than Nathan's waist.

And hanging from that outstretched arm, held by a hand on his neck, was Duke Crocker. He was still alive, clinging to the man's wrist with one of his arms; the other hung limp at his side.

Audrey was shouting at the guy, trying to talk him down, but she didn't have her gun. Nathan, having just walked in, couldn't have guessed where it was. Not that it mattered. He knew where his gun was just fine, thanks.

It was only years of training and iron-clad self control that allowed him to restrain his trigger finger long enough to call out his warning. "Let him go," he commanded, his voice strong enough to carry across the yard as he ran to close the distance. He stopped with only a few yards between them; at this distance, he wouldn't miss. Not a target that big.

The man looked at him. "This town is riddled with sin and filth; it needs to be cleansed. I am cleansing it," said the beast.

"I said put him down, or I will shoot. This is your last warning," Nathan said, and he meant it. Duke's struggles had started to wane, his face gone red from lack of oxygen.

In his head, Nathan counted to five. At the end of the count, when Duke was still suspended in the air, he fulfilled his promise. Bang! Straight through the head, and in an instant, the man crumpled to the ground. Duke went with him, dropping a few feet away to the ground he'd been held over.

Instinct begged Nathan to run to Duke, to make sure he was okay, but he couldn't do that. He had to make sure the guy was dead, first, or else he had to call an ambulance. Audrey was running towards him too, though, so Nathan managed to force himself to see to the beast first.

Sure enough, it had been a kill shot, clean through one side of his head and out through the other. On any other day, he would've been proud. Today, though—

"He's not breathing!" Audrey shouted, snapping Nathan's attention over to where she sat crouched over Duke's body. She'd turned him over onto his back, and sure enough, Nathan couldn't see his chest rising or falling.

Nathan was by them in an instant, dropping to his knees on Duke's other side. Wisely, Audrey leaned back to give him room as Nathan leaned down and put his ear next to Duke's mouth and nose.

Nothing.

He pressed two fingers to the side of Duke's neck, feeling for the pulse he prayed to find. Relief surged through him when he felt a weak thud against his fingertips, followed by another. He had a pulse, but it was weak and slow. He wasn't breathing, though, and that was something Nathan had to fix.

Tilting Duke's head back to try to open up his airway, Nathan took in a breath and pressed his lips to Duke's. Somewhere in the back of his head, he registered some gasps echoing through the crowd of church-going onlookers, but he didn't care. The only thing that mattered was the man lying still on the ground before him.

Another breath, and still nothing.

Another. Nothing.

Another. Nothing.

Another. Noth—a gasp. Eyes flying open and lips parting around a frantic, gulping breath, Duke lurched forward, rolling over onto his side as he started to cough. The coughs led to gags, and Duke started to throw up in the grass.

To keep his boyfriend from falling face-first in his own sick, Nathan slipped an arm under his neck and reached a hand around to his chest to hold him on his side. He hadn't quite managed to roll over all the way, and Nathan was just hoping to keep him angled enough that he wouldn't inhale any of it and aspirate.

"It's okay," he told Duke. "It's okay, just catch your breath." Nathan looked up to see Audrey on her phone. No doubt she was calling in some back-up and some EMS support. Probably the coroner, too. He didn't care about that, though.

As Duke finally ran out of stomach acid to throw up, Nathan rolled him back over to his back. It was only then that Nathan noticed the gash running just over his left eyebrow. The grimace on Duke's face pulled at it, and a new stream of blood trickled down it to join the sweat and dirt. Duke looked to be in agony, one arm clutching at his chest. The other, just as before, didn't move, and he noticed the same seemed to be the case with his leg. His right leg was bent, the heel of his boot grinding into the grass while the other stayed stretched out. Nathan was no doctor, but he didn't like the angle of his knee.

It wasn't the time to worry about that now, though. Right now, he had to make sure that Duke didn't go into shock while they waited for the paramedics. To do that, he had to get him talking. "Duke," he started, but Duke didn't even open his eyes. "Come on, baby, I need you to look at me."

When Duke didn't open his eyes still, Nathan frowned. He hated to do it, but he reached up a hand and slapped Duke's cheek. Not too hard, but enough to get his attention. Sure enough, those brown eyes opened and he found himself staring into two bloodshot, rapidly-darkening hazel eyes. He was still relieved.

"Good, Duke. That's good. I need you to tell me where you're hurt now," he said. He spoke quickly, but he tried to keep his voice calm. Hopefully, Duke didn't notice his hands shaking as he cradled the smaller man against his chest.

Duke let out a weak chuckle, which only seemed to make the pain worse. The chuckle morphed into a moan of pain as he clenched his eyes shut again, his good leg kicking against the grass. "So needy," he choked out. His voice was hoarse, barely above a whisper, but then Nathan guessed nearly being strangled could do that to a person.

Nathan forced a laugh of his own. "Yeah, that's me. Needy. I've got to know, though, Duke, so I can tell the paramedics when they get here."

Nathan realized his mistake as soon as the words left his mouth. Duke and hospitals of any sort were not a happy combination, mostly on Duke's side. Duke told him once about how he'd had to watch his mother waste away in one of those hospitals, and how ever since, he'd been afraid of them. He guessed it made sense; all Duke saw when he saw a hospital was a place of dying, not a place of healing.

Duke's reaction wasn't in quite so many words. The smuggler's eyes widened, and he started trying to scramble up, grabbing onto Nathan's jacket with his good hand for purchase.

"Hey, hey, it's okay," Nathan said quickly, tightening his hold on his boyfriend. He was careful not to hold him too tight, though, since he didn't know how badly Duke had been beaten up before he'd shown up. He also grabbed hold of the hand Duke had fisted around his jacket and eased the fingers away, eliminating Duke's means of pulling himself up. As Duke let out a strained protest, Nathan took to carding a hand through his hair. "I know, baby. I know you don't want to go, but you have to. You've probably got a concussion and God knows what else."

"I'm fine," Duke rasped urgently. "No doctors."

Clearly, this was upsetting Duke, which in turn was making him breathe faster, which in turn was making him turn paler. Nathan wondered if maybe he'd broken some ribs. Regardless, he needed to calm him down. That meant getting his mind of the impending threat of doctors. "Don't worry about that now, okay?" he said. "Just try to focus on taking deep breaths for me."

"Can't," was Duke's breathless response. "Burns."

"Your lungs?" Nathan asked. He didn't like the sound of that.

But Duke shook his head. "Stomach," he said.

At first, Nathan was confused. Then, he looked down and knew _exactly _what Duke was talking about. On his side, down by his right hip, was a rapidly-spreading spot of red on his otherwise white t-shirt and even down on his khaki jeans. From the looks of it, it was some sort of knife wound, and it looked pretty bad. More blood wept from it with each breath Duke took, and Nathan couldn't believe he hadn't seen it sooner.

"Audrey!" he called, and his partner came running over, kneeling down across from him. "I need your shirt or a blazer or something else to stop the bleeding." Audrey looked confused at first, but then looked down to where Nathan's hand was hovering. Her eyes widened at that, and she quickly unfastened the buttons on her dress shirt. In record time, she slid it off, leaving her in her tank top while she passed it over to Nathan.

Adjusting his hold on his boyfriend so that he had one hand cradling his shoulders and neck and the other free, Nathan forced a smile. "I'm not gonna lie, Duke; this is gonna hurt, but I need you to bear with me, okay?"

Duke's lip quivered at the thought of more pain. "What're you gonna—" Duke's question was cut short as Nathan pressed the balled-up shirt against his side. The younger man let out a choked cry before he managed to grit his teeth around it, writhing in Nathan's lap. He bit his lip, muffling the scream breaking from his aching throat.

Nathan pressed a kiss to his boyfriend's sweat-slicked brow. "Sorry, baby," he said quickly. "I'm sorry, but I had to stop the bleeding. You're okay, now, all right? You're okay."

But he wasn't. Nathan knew it, and Duke knew it, too. Whatever had happened, Duke was seriously hurt. He was crying, now, and for Duke to cry, Nathan knew it had to be bad.

Mercifully, the sound of sirens started to grow in volume until they were nearly deafening. "They're here," Audrey said, pushing herself to her feet. She would fill everyone in; Nathan had his hands full with Duke.

"Help's here," Nathan told his boyfriend. "They'll get you some really great pain meds and when you wake up, you'll be back to your swashbuckling like a real pirate."

"Now I know I'm fucked," Duke gritted out. "Calling me a pirate."

"You're gonna be fine," Nathan insisted.

Duke let out another soft, choking laugh. "Don't feel fine," he said.

As he spoke, Nathan glanced down at the bloody wound on his side. Blood was still seeping steadily through the fabric, so he applied more pressure. The added pressure brought forth a cry from Duke who instinctively tried to shift away from Nathan's hand. Nathan held him firm, though, as Duke let out the most pitiful whimpers he'd ever heard.

"Don't," he choked out. "Don't do that again."

Nathan nodded and adjusted his grip on Duke. He wouldn't say he wouldn't do it again; he wouldn't lie. Instead, he held him a little closer and tried to keep him calm. "Just hang tight for me for a few more seconds, Duke. You're gonna be okay."

Right about then, though, the paramedics decided to show up. Audrey came before them, dropping down in front of Nathan.

"They're here, Nathan," she said, and then moved to the side so that the paramedics could lay out a stretcher beside Duke. Duke saw it, and his eyes went wide.

"No, no, no," Duke said, grabbing onto Nathan's upper arm with his good hand and trying to get away from the paramedics as they reached for him. "Nathan, no." He didn't care how much pain he was in; he wasn't going to the goddamn hospital.

Too bad no one else agreed with him. As the paramedics got hold of his long legs, Nathan helped them move him over onto the stretcher. The movement brought another barely-concealed scream from between Duke's clenched teeth, and for a moment, he didn't fight back. It wasn't until they tried to secure the bands around his neck that Duke started to put up a fight.

The feeling of something around his neck, of choking, made Duke gasp and try to push the paramedics' hands away. There were two of them, though, plus one Nathan, and he only had one arm to use. The other hurt too bad at the shoulder and was too numb at the fingers to be any good.

"It's just going to hold your head steady," one of the paramedics – a middle-aged blonde woman with her hair in a tight bun – explained to him as he twisted his head. His neck hurt, he realized.

"Can't breathe," he choked out, and to his alarm, he knew he really couldn't. He tried to lean his head back, trying to draw in a better breath, but it wasn't working. He was suffocating, and with each breath he was unable to take in, it got worse.

Nathan watched as panic spread on Duke's face. His chest jumped up and down impossibly fast like he was having to struggle to catch his breath, and he was trying to grab at the straps holding his head and neck to the brace on the stretcher.

"Panic attack," said the other paramedic succinctly. "We get them all the time."

Yeah, well it wasn't _Duke_ all the time. Resisting the urge to punch the callous EMT in the face, Nathan instead turned his attention to his boyfriend. "Duke, you're okay, just catch your breath," he told him.

The first EMT, the nicer one, also chimed in. "Come on, honey, just breathe with me. In, out. In, out." The woman took overdramatized breaths as she spoke and Nathan found himself unintentionally breathing with her. It wasn't working for Duke, though. "Charley, get the oxygen," she commanded. The second EMT – the jackass – turned and pulled open the bag they'd brought with him, pulling out a small tank and mask. In a matter of seconds, he had the whole thing assembled, and handed the mask to the woman who pressed it over Duke's face.

That didn't exactly calm him, it seemed. He went from trying to undo the straps on the stretcher to trying to push the mask away. Nathan saw Jackass going for him, and beat him to the punch, intercepting Duke's hand and pulling it against his chest as he rested a hand on Duke's head. "Take it easy, Duke. Just take it easy."

And slowly, surely, Duke's breathing started to slow. His eyes stayed wide open, he continued to twist and writhe on the stretcher, but the steady puff of fog against the plastic of the mask proved that he was breathing a little easier.

It picked up a little as the EMT's lifted the stretcher, but Nathan held his hand firm. "Audrey," he called, "I'm going with him."

She nodded. "Go. I've got things here. Keep me posted."

As they loaded Duke into the ambulance, though, Jackass (Charles) held up a hand. "Only family can ride in the ambulance."

Nathan stared the shorter man down. He was riding in that ambulance, if he had to hijack the damn thing himself. "I'm his next of kin, his emergency contact, and without me, chances are he'll do everything he possibly can to get loose. You _really_ want to play that card with me?"

Jackass looked at the nice lady, who nodded, and he wisely stepped out of the way, allowing Nathan to climb into the ambulance and sit beside Duke. The younger man was watching him with wide eyes, his chest heaving deeply.

"Don't have…to come," Duke said hoarsely between straining breaths.

But Nathan just smiled and took Duke's hand back in his. "Yeah," he said. "I do."


	2. Chapter 2

It was four hours after he was admitted before they finally allowed Nathan back to see Duke. The younger man had spent three of those hours in surgery, as they pieced him back together. As it turned out, his boyfriend had gotten pretty beat up. Starting at the head, he had a concussion, and the split over his eyebrow had taken seven stitches to close up. The man's strangle hold on him had fractured his larynx. His right shoulder had been dislocated and he had a hairline fracture on his forearm. Three ribs were broken, two bruised, and from what the nurse had told him, his whole torso was just a splatter portrait of nasty bruises.

The cut on his side had taken thirty-four stitches to close up, reaching all the way from his left hip around his side to nearly his spine. And his leg…nothing was broken, but Nathan was pretty sure he'd heard every letter of the alphabet talking about what was torn. ACL, MCL, L. meniscus, and M. meniscus, all some degree of torn, sprained, or hyper-extended.

They'd repaired everything they could at the time, and now it was just a matter of waiting for him to wake up from the anesthesia.

Nathan wasn't sure how long he'd been sitting there in the hard plastic chair next to Duke's bed, but his ass was starting to go numb. Not that it mattered – he was too intent on the man lying in the bed to care about it. God, Duke looked so…wrong, lying there. His normally olive skin was pale and marred with angry purple bruises. A crisp white bandaged wrapped around his head pushed all his hair up away from his brow, and Nathan knew that beneath the covers, there were plenty more bandages just like it. His leg was propped up to help with the swelling, and his right arm was in a sling across his chest.

To his side, a heart monitor beeped a steady rhythm as a tube carried clear liquid from a bag on a stand into his boyfriend's slender arm. He was pretty sure he hadn't even blinked since he walked in the room, but a noise from the door had him doing just that.

"Hey," Audrey greeted softly as she walked in. "How's he doing?"

Nathan waited until she'd grabbed the seat on the other side of Duke's bed before he answered. "He's stable," Nathan said. "He's beat to hell, but he's stable."

Audrey nodded slowly, reaching out to brush a strand of errant hair from the bandage on Duke's head. "He really came through back there," she said.

"What happened?" Nathan asked. He'd been wanting to know, and now seemed like as good a time as any.

"I don't know. We went to the church to talk to the Rev. and when we got there…" She shook her head, her eyes wide as she rubbed her face. "I've never seen anything like that, Nathan. He just showed up out of nowhere. There was a little girl and he said she was Troubled, that she 'had to be cleansed.' Rev. started screaming and everyone started running. I told Duke to get them out, and I tried to talk to the guy."

"I take it that didn't go so well," Nathan guessed.

Audrey let out a half-chuckle. "That's an understatement. He ended up knocking my gun away. I remember, he was aiming for me, and then Duke just appeared out of nowhere. He had a candlestick from the church, and he hit him, and then…well, you saw him. He just kept hitting him, and Duke just kept getting up. I tried to help him, but I couldn't even get close. He just…he held the guy off by himself. I don't know how he did it."

Nathan was just about to reply when a new voice entered the conversation. It was so soft, he barely heard it, but he did.

"Magic."

Nathan felt his heart leap in his chest, and dropped his gaze down from Audrey to the slender form on the bed.

Sure enough, peering out from bruised, half-open eyelids was the most gorgeous pair of hazel eyes Nathan had ever seen.

He promptly stood, as Duke's face twisted into a grimace. "Morning, sunshine," he greeted softly, resting a hand in Duke's thick hair. "How're you feeling?"

Duke, in typical Duke fashion, managed to conjure a chuckle and a smile, even as his eyes watered. "Fan—" His voice cracked, and he reached up for his bandaged neck. Nathan caught his hand, though, and used the other to fish a piece of ice out of the cup on the bedside. Duke eyed it as Nathan brought it to his lips. "Water?" he mouthed out, because apparently, his swollen throat had given up on him.

"Sorry, baby, you're stuck on ice chips for now," Nathan said. Duke didn't look too happy to hear that answer, but all the same, he let Nathan slip the piece of ice past his lips. A few crunches, and Duke's throat bobbed.

And then he promptly started sputtering.

He tried to sit up, but it didn't work very well, what with his ribs and the cut on his side. "Hey, hey, easy," Nathan said, catching Duke before he could hurt himself and easing him up just enough to help him catch his breath.

It took a little while, and when he finally did, he was so pale Nathan was afraid he was going to pass out again. His face was twisted in a grimace, and the arm that wasn't secured to his side in a brace went to wrap around his middle. As Nathan lowered him back to the pillows, he saw moisture welling in those hazel eyes and felt his heart wrench in sympathy.

Behind him, as if to prove the powers of her intuition, Audrey stood. "I'm going to go talk to a nurse…see if they can give him something to help with the pain."

Nathan nodded. He appreciated the reason she said she was going, but he also appreciated the _real_ reason she was going: to give him time alone with Duke. Duke wouldn't want her to see him crying; it was bad enough that Nathan was seeing it, and he was his boyfriend.

Once Audrey was out of the room, Nathan turned his attention back to Duke. The younger man was still trying to hold back tears, and he was laughing softly like he always did when he was hurt and didn't want it to show.

Nathan's heart ached at the sight. Frowning, he leaned down and kissed Duke gently, carding a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry," he whispered. And he was. He was sorry that he hadn't been there to protect him, he was sorry that Duke had gotten hurt, and he was sorry that there was nothing he could do to take his pain away. He would've born it all if he could, every ounce of it, but instead he was stuck with the feeling of Duke's tears against his fingers and his soft, chuckling sobs.

Duke cleared his throat. "I'm fine," he rasped. Even the two words seemed to take a tremendous effort from him, and more tears rolled down his cheeks.

"You will be," Nathan told him. Careful of the scratches on Duke's cheek, he brushed his thumbs over the tear tracks, wiping them away even as more fell to take their place. "You're gonna hang out here for a couple of days and let them pump you full of all sorts of really great drugs until you're belting 'Row Your Boat' like that time after your birthday party."

That got a smile out of Duke – a real one, not the mask of one he donned to hide his pain. "Sounds fun," he said. He started to shift, but stopped and let out a harsh breath through his nose. His good hand went once again to the bandage Nathan knew to be on his hip, and he turned in towards his hurt shoulder.

"No you don't." Nathan put a hand on his other shoulder, holding it back to the bed to keep him from curling up as he was want to do. "Moving's gonna make it worse, babe; just try to keep still."

"Keeping still hurts too," Duke muttered. His voice was rasped and ragged, but it was starting to get better. All the same, Nathan reached into the cup and picked out another ice chip.

"I'm supposed to get you to eat one of these every few minutes," Nathan explained at Duke's incredulous look.

"No thanks," he muttered. It hadn't worked so well the last time, that ice.

But Nathan was persistent. Maybe he didn't listen to doctor's orders when they were directed at him, but with Duke, it was word of law. "Let's go; open up." Duke's lips stayed pursed though. "Come on, babe, humor me," he urged, tracing Duke's cracked lips with the melting ice. The clear liquid pooled in the crevasse of his lips, until Nathan pulled them apart with his thumb. Finally, Duke gave in and opened his mouth just enough for Nathan to slip the chip of ice in. "Now don't chew this time. Let it melt."

The chip hadn't been that big to begin with, and Duke didn't speak until it had melted. "Nate," he began, and went to push himself up on the bed. He barely got his shoulders an inch up off the bed before he gave up. "Fuck!" With a cry of fury and pain, he slammed his hand down on the bed, which in turn only seemed to make him hurt worse.

"Hey, hey…Duke, calm down," Nathan soothed, taking Duke's smaller hand in his own. Between the frustration and the pain, Duke's tears returned in force. This time, Nathan couldn't just stand there. He pushed the rail down on the bed and sat down on the edge, leaning over and taking Duke gently into his arms. He was afraid to hurt him, but at the same time, Duke was such a physical person; he lived for warm embraces and gentle kisses.

And as if that was what he'd been waiting for, Duke melted into Nathan's arms, fisting his good hand in Nathan's t-shirt. "Christ, this hurts," Duke groaned through grit teeth, burrowing his head into Nathan's shirt.

"I know, babe." Nathan held him as firmly as he dared, cradling his head against his shoulder. "It's gonna be okay, though. Audrey's gone to get a nurse. She'll get you something for the pain, and then maybe you can get some sleep." After all, if they gave Duke anything stronger than Tylenol, he'd probably be out of his head for a while. Nathan had discovered early that his boyfriend didn't have a very strong resistance to medication, and frankly, he wasn't going to complain this time. He'd give anything to get Duke some relief.

Duke, on the other hand… "Don't want drugs," he ground out. "Hate 'em." Alas, the perpetual dilemma: the pain meds would make him feel a whole lot better, but they'd make him fuzzy; and while Duke no doubt wanted to feel better, Nathan knew he absolutely despised being fuzzy. Duke hated any loss of control, and the fact that he was in what was probably one of his least favorite places on earth probably wasn't helping all that much.

And, of course, the nurse chose that moment to walk in. The older woman seemed to take his and Duke's position in stride, padding into the room in her bright purple scrubs. "Nice to see you're awake, Mister Crocker," she said. "I hear you might be wanting another dose of happy. How about something to help you sleep?"

Nathan felt Duke's good hand start to push against his chest, but it wasn't strong enough to do much of anything. "I'll pass," he ground out, even as the effort of trying to push Nathan away brought a strained whine of pain from the back of his throat.

"Just let her do what she needs to do," Nathan told him. "It'll help."

"I said I don't want it!" There was a sort of desperate pleading in Duke's voice that made Nathan's heart bleed. Duke was getting upset again, and he was part of the reason.

Still, he couldn't keep being in pain like this. And Nathan couldn't bear to keep _watching_ it. "You need to get some relief, babe; the meds'll help."

"They'll mess with my head!" Duke snapped in response, his voice hitching higher even as his injuries made it crack.

Duke was trying to push Nathan away from him, and finally, Nathan conceded. Gently, he lowered him back to the bed, but instead of letting him go, he held him there. Turning to the nurse, he gave her a nod to go ahead with the pain meds. She had a syringe with her, and she pulled the cap off.

"Don't!" Duke shouted, and it was the harshest, most torn sound Nathan had ever heard. He was watching the nurse's every movement with wild, panicked eyes, until finally Nathan put a hand to the side of his face and turned his head the other way. Leaning down on Duke's other side, he forced him to meet his eyes as he held his hand down to the bed. The rest of him wasn't moving anywhere. Not with the injuries he had.

"Take it easy, Duke. Just take it easy."

Mercifully, the nurse was silent, and as soon as she finished emptying the syringe into Duke's IV, she was gone.

"Let go!" Duke cried at Nathan. He didn't know the nurse was gone, or that it was already too late.

Rather than letting go, he pulled his boyfriend close again. This time, Duke tried futilely to push him away, but he just held firm, hushing him and stroking his fingers through his hair. "It's just me," he told him as Duke writhed in his arms. "Relax, babe, it's just me. I've got you."

"I don't—" Duke's voice cracked, but whether it was from rising hysteria or his injured throat, Nathan couldn't be sure. "—don't want it."

Too bad he already got it.

But Nathan wasn't going to tell him that. He didn't want to upset his boyfriend more than he already was. If anything, he wanted to get him calmed down. "You're gonna be okay, Duke. Everything's gonna be okay."

Slowly, but surely, Duke's struggles began to wane as the pain medicine began to work its magic. The tension was easing from his slender form as Nathan held him, and his eyes started to take on a dazed look.

"Shit," he whispered after a moment, his head lolling back. Nathan adjusted his grip on him, supporting his head in the crook of his elbow. "She already…already…and I hate painkillers, Nate. I hate being fuzz…fuzzy." It was as if he started to realize the medicine was taking effect, because he took in a deep breath and tried to sit up. "I'm not…Nate, I'm not…"

Nathan just hushed him, running the backs of his fingertips gently down Duke's cheek. "I know, babe. It's okay."

Duke's eyes were starting to slip closed, try as he might to keep them open. "Nate," he whined, grabbing at Nathan's arm with clumsy fingers. When he finally found purchase, he held it, but he was having trouble.

"Shh," Nathan soothed. He made sure to keep his voice low, hoping to help lull his boyfriend. "Just take slow, deep breaths…let your eyes close…." Whether he wanted to or not, Duke was starting to do just that. "'Atta boy…I've got you, babe, just relax."

Duke made a soft noise – a soft "nhh" like he was maybe trying to say Nathan's name – but that was all he could muster.

Nathan allowed himself a small smile, and pressed a soft kiss to Duke's lightly-parted lips. "Just go to sleep, babe. Just go to sleep."

But he needn't have said anything; Duke was already asleep.

Unwilling to surrender his hold on his injured, sleeping boyfriend, Nathan shifted to get more comfortable on the bed. He kept his arms around Duke, and after a moment, he was situated with his boyfriend still cradled against his chest.

That was about when Audrey came in, and her eyes widened momentarily at the sight of Duke curled up against Nathan on his hospital bed. Her expression softened quickly, though, and she smiled. "I take it he's feeling better?" she asked.

Nathan nodded, unable to tear his gaze from the sleeping form cradled in his arms. "The pain medicine really helped. Thanks."

"It was the least I could do," Audrey said, leaning back against the doorframe and folding her arms across her chest. "Considering he saved my life and all."

"Leave it to Duke to play the hero," Nathan said softly, but his tone was laced with fondness and affection that Audrey didn't miss.

She chuckled. "I wonder where he might've learned that," she said, looking very pointedly at Nathan.

Nathan just shook his head, absently brushing a stray strand of hair from Duke's face. "No, it's not me. He'd deny it to his deathbed, but he's a hero all by his lonesome."

_All by his lonesome,_ Nathan thought to himself. _But never alone. _


	3. Chapter 3

"Would you please just try to eat something?" Audrey practically begged, holding the spoon up to Duke's face like a parent trying to feed an unruly toddler.

"I'll eat _food_," Duke clarified. "And food, that is not." He was eyeing the contents of the spoon and the bowl in Audrey's other hand dubiously. Three days into his stay at the hospital, they'd only just started to allow him semi-solid foods. Jell-O, ginger ale, and chicken soup which was what he was presently refusing to eat. Audrey had been sitting with him for the past half hour trying to get him to eat it.

"I'm gonna tell Nathan when he gets back that you weren't being a good patient," she threatened. Nathan had gone home to shower and change about an hour ago, so she imagined he would be getting back soon.

Duke smiled a strained smile and leaned back on his propped-up bed. "You do that," he said. "I'll tell him you tried to poison me."

"Afraid I'm gonna have to side with Audrey on this one." Both Audrey and Duke turned to see Nathan standing in the doorway, freshly showered, shaved, and clothed in some jeans and a gray t-shirt.

Audrey smiled and dropped the spoon back into the Styrofoam cup, handing it to Nathan as he approached. "He's all yours," she said. "Unlike some of us, I actually have to go to work today."

"I don't need a babysitter, you know," Duke said.

Nathan just ignored him, sliding onto the bed beside Duke and pressing a quick kiss to his cheek. "'Course you don't. You just need someone to feed you, wash you, and appease you when you get fussy. That doesn't sound like a babysitter at all."

Duke scowled. "You're funny."

"It's part of my charm," Nathan replied. "And speaking of charm, what's with all the trouble you're giving Officer Parker? I thought you'd be happy to finally get to eat."

"I'm not eating that," Duke insisted. "My stomach hurts enough as it is, thanks." Even though it was meant as a quip, Nathan could tell there was a grain of sincerity in the complaint. He'd definitely improved since the first day, but he was still in bad shape. They'd started to lower his dosage on his pain medicine, too; honestly, Nathan could understand why he might be a little bit cranky.

All the same, it was important that Duke start to eat. If he didn't, they'd have to keep him on IV fluids, and, if he persisted in his boycott, they'd have to do a feeding tube. Nathan had half a mind to tell him that, but threats weren't really a personal favorite for Nathan. He'd rather just convince him to cooperate, instead of scaring him into it.

"Come on, babe, it's not that bad. It's just what a growing boy needs."

Duke arched an eyebrow – the one that wasn't nestled beneath a patch of bruise and steri-strips – and scowled disdainfully. "You can see the grease in it," he grumbled.

"And since you got here, you've been losing weight that you didn't have to begin with," Audrey cut in. "I don't think you have to sweat the saturated fats."

Her intervention got Audrey a flash of Duke's glare, before it settled back on his true enemy: the Styrofoam bowl still in Nathan's hand.

"Well, I have to get to work. You two boys be good," Audrey said, and started for the door.

Duke waved at her with his good hand. "Yes, Mom."

Once she was gone, Nathan turned his attention back to Duke. "All right, Duke, let's get this over with." He dipped the plastic spoon into the soup and raised it to Duke's face. "Open up."

Duke pursed his lips.

"I swear to you, Duke, I am not above feeding you like a two-year-old."

Duke stared at him levelly.

"Is this the part where I start making train noises?"

A hint of a smile.

Nathan just sighed. "Please, Duke. You don't have to eat the whole thing, just humor me and take a few bites?" He held up the spoon again.

"I just want to sleep," Duke mumbled, sinking down on the bed like he was trying to disappear into the sheets.

"You can sleep as long as you want," Nathan began, "_after_ you eat something."

Duke's lips fell into a frown and he half-laughed, half-cried. "I don't _want_ to eat something. I don't want to eat anything! Not their fucking chicken soup, or their Jell-O, or the damn ice chips they keep trying to shove down my throat! I—" The yelling seemed to get the best of him, and a round of coughs broke forth, rattling his bruised chest. Nathan sat the soup down on the bed tray and helped Duke lean forward, rubbing his back.

"Catch your breath, babe."

After a moment, Duke did. If possible, he deflated even more, looking ever more pitiful by the second. "I just want to go home," he finished softer.

And thus, they arrived at the center of this particular little dispute. Duke was tired of being at the hospital. He was tired and hurting and just generally fed up. Like Nathan had said before: he didn't blame him for it.

"I'll take you home soon, babe. Once the doctors clear you, I'll wheel you out myself if you want. But you've got to get better before we can go, and if you want to get better, you've got to get your strength back. You can't get better on a saline drip alone, so just open up for me, okay?"

This time, when Nathan held the spoon up to his lips, albeit with no small amount of hesitation, Duke did open his mouth. As soon as Nathan pulled the now-clean spoon back, Duke grimaced.

"God, what did I just eat?" he groaned. "Salty grease. I just ate salty grease."

Nathan smiled and made a show of swirling the spoon around the cup. "I think I see some vegetables in here, too," he said, and held up another spoonful of soup which his boyfriend begrudgingly swallowed. Nathan smiled. "There, see? Is that so bad?"

Duke's lip curled. "It's cruel and unusual," he scowled, but accepted another spoonful nonetheless. "I should press charges."

"Sorry, Duke. I think I heard the police chief was off duty," he chuckled. "Something about a bedridden boyfriend with a finicky palate…."

"I assure you I have no idea…" Another spoonful. "…what you're talking about. God, this stuff is terrible."

"Well, you're about halfway through. Think you can stomach a few more spoonfuls?"

"I'd rather not."

Nathan chuckled. Leaning in, he brushed his lips against Duke's. "Just three more, babe, then I'll leave you alone."

Duke watched him for a moment, but finally let out a longsuffering sigh that Nathan took to be a concession. Nathan held him to that, tipping three more spoonfuls of the soup into his mouth before setting the bowl aside on the table.

When he reached into the cup of ice chips, Duke fixed him with a glare. "I thought you'd said you'd leave me alone," he said.

Slipping the ice chip between Duke's lips, Nathan smiled unapologetically. "I lied."

For that, he got an eye roll from his boyfriend. Duke didn't say anything, though, instead leaning back against Nathan's chest.

"Tired?" Nathan asked as his boyfriend settled in against him. He was careful not to move too much, but he also helped Duke get situated. His sides, namely the one with the gash, were still giving him trouble. His leg had recently become a little bit of an issue, too, now that Duke was getting more and more restless.

Mercifully, this move went smoothly, and soon, Duke was lying back against Nathan's chest, his head resting in the crook of Nathan's shoulder. "Feels like I'm dying of old age again," Duke said suddenly, his voice slow and soft. His eyes were already closed.

"Why's that?" Nathan asked. Part of him was worried, and the other part was curious. He hoped Duke didn't _feel_ like he was dying, though with wounds like that, he would understand if he did.

Duke let out a little yawn and gave a one-sided shrug. "Tired old man," he muttered. "Always want to nap."

"That's not necessarily a bad thing," Nathan said, brushing a hand through his boyfriend's thick black locks. They were soft again now, and clean thanks to a sort of semi-bath he'd given him yesterday. It had been a little difficult, trying to wash Duke's hair in a basin (though he personally hadn't minded the sponge bath) but Duke had felt a lot better afterwards. For someone that spent a good quarter of his life covered in sea water and engine grease, Duke sure did have an affinity for being clean.

"'S annoying," Duke said.

Nathan craned his neck to look at him, curious. "How so?"

Duke gave another little one-sided shrug, this one a lot less noticeable than the last. "You finally take off work," he started. "Y' never do that. You finally do, and all I want to do is sleep. 'S not fair."

"Ah…" Nathan chewed his lip thoughtfully. "Well, what if I promise to take some days off _after_ you're better, too?"

"You can do that?"

"Being the police chief does have its advantages."

That got a chuckle out of Duke. "Look at you, abusing your power. I've corrupted you."

"That's what I keep telling you. You're a bad influence." He smiled and stole another kiss before adjusting Duke's covers. He was normally a cold-blooded guy – thus the innumerable cardigans – and being sick had only intensified the condition. Nathan always made sure he was well covered, because the scrub pants and robe (folded over a generous wrapping of bandages) did little to keep him warm. "So, it's a date. Now why don't you get some sleep."

Duke craned his neck, looking up at Nathan with half-lidded eyes and a smile. "Promise you'll still be here when I wake up?"

"I'm not going anywhere."


	4. Chapter 4

"Duke, slow down," Nathan told him. He was getting antsy just watching Duke as his younger boyfriend struggled with the buttons on his jeans. With one arm in a cast and still strapped to his bandaged chest, he was having to do it one-handed. Since he couldn't really bend at the hips, courtesy of the massive gash and the stitches still residing there, he was having to lean back awkwardly against the bed to try to pull them up, all the while balancing on his one good leg. All in all, it wasn't working very well.

"No!" Duke snapped nonetheless. "The sooner I get dressed, the sooner I can get out of this fluorescent hell."

"Yeah, and if you fall or mess something up, the longer you're gonna _stay_ in this fluorescent hell."

Duke glared at him. "If you don't have something helpful to say, kindly keep your mouth shut." He almost had his jeans fastened, but at the last second, his shaking fingers slipped. It must've pulled something, because he let out a pained gasp and a swear, his face twisting into a grimace.

Nathan promptly pushed off the wall he'd been leaning against and walked over to him. He reached for him, but Duke batted him away. "Hey," Nathan said softly, sliding his hands around Duke's waist. This time, Duke allowed it, and after a soft hug, Nathan turned him around and pulled him back against his chest. "What do you say you let me help you?" he asked. His chin was resting on Duke's uninjured shoulder, and his lips were close to Duke's ear. "That is, after all, what I'm here for."

A soft chuckle rumbled in Duke's chest as he leaned back into his boyfriend's chest. "I was wondering what you were good for," he teased, turning to steal a quick kiss from his helpful lover. "I guess that answers that."

"Ooh, look who's getting his lip back. He must be feeling better." Nathan smiled and reached around Duke's narrow hips, carefully fastening Duke's jeans and pulling up the zipper. "There, see? On to the shirt." Keeping a steadying hand on Duke's hips, he grabbed Duke's fleece-lined canvas jacket. It was cold outside, and it would be both warm and soft for him.

Duke went to take it, but Nathan just slipped the sleeve over his good arm, pulling it up over his shoulder. The other side he simply draped over his shoulder, letting the empty sleeve hang loose at his side.

Duke had one boot on, and only a sock on his left foot, because the knee brace on it held it off the ground anyway.

"All right, well, it looks like you're ready to go," Nathan said, pressing a quick kiss to his boyfriend's lips.

"And not a second too soon," Duke said. He went for a kiss of his own, but Nathan stopped him with a hand on his chest.

"Maybe not soon enough," Nathan muttered, turning Duke around with a hand on his hip.

Standing in the doorway was none other than Reverend Driscoll, an expression of smug, barely-concealed disdain on his face.

Nathan felt Duke stiffen in his arms.

"I was visiting the hospital for my weekly Wednesday sermons. I thought I might stop by to…_check in_ with the man who saved my flock. You can imagine my surprise, walking in to find you in the arms of…well, I think you understand."

Nathan, for one was just going to ignore the Rev. The bigot would always find something wrong with him – be it his Troubles, his ethics, or his relationships – and frankly, he had bigger things to worry about.

But Duke, it seemed, wasn't quite so ready to let the comment pass. "Oh yeah, I understand perfectly," he sneered. "I understand that your ego, among _other things_, is in such desperate need of a stroking, you'll take any chance you can to play Saint. I understand that, probably as a result of some deep-seeded Daddy issues or some other bullshit like that, you can't stand the idea that your word isn't always the fucking law." He limped forward, a caustic smirk on his face. "And I understand that it must be really fucking hard to go home at the end of the day to nothing but a bottle of scotch and a dusty old book. What I don't _understand_ is how even a pathetic, self-righteous, Bible-thumping son of a _bitch_ could stand there and watch some guy about to kill a little girl!"

"And what would you have had me do, son?" Rev asked, his tone distinctly condescending. "I'm neither young nor fit; I wouldn't have ended up in the hospital. I would have ended up dead."

"And it would have been exactly what you deserve, you fucking hypocrite!" Duke shouted, his voice coming out rasped and raw and full of so much fury, Nathan felt his own eyes widening. Duke was never like this. Duke was always so controlled, so calm. To see him like this, seething mad and screaming…it was surreal.

Until he found out why.

"It would've been disgusting enough if you'd just stood there. You preach about love and courage and saints and God's-fucking-glory like you're its very embodiment here on earth, but when it came time to show it, to save that little girl's _life_, where was your halo then?"

"Duke…" Nathan started, reaching a hand for him, but Duke shrugged him off.

"You…you, Rev, are a special kind of fucked up! Standing there would've been one thing, but you weren't just standing there, were you? You weren't just watching it happen, sitting on your hands like a useless, hypocritical sack of shit!"

"Duke!" Nathan tried again. Duke was breathing hard, and Nathan wasn't sure how much longer he'd be able to stay up on his one foot.

"No! Nathan, he wasn't just sitting there!" Duke shouted. "He was fucking cheering him on! What was it you said, Rev? 'The ungodly must be cleansed'? Remind me how the hell a seven-year-old girl can be ungodly, you sick fuck!" And in an instant, Duke launched himself at the man. Nathan just barely managed to get a hold of him, locking his arms around Duke's waist as he screamed at the man, "He was going to rip her apart, and you justified it! You told him to do it, to kill an innocent little girl, and yet you stand there in that door and act like the holiest thing since Mother-fucking-Theresa!"

"Duke, calm down. Just calm down."

"You didn't hear her scream, Nate. You didn't see her crying, see the way that guy was coming at her. All because of him! You say the Troubled are monsters, but how the fuck can you look in a mirror? You're worse than every last one of them!"

It was all Nathan could do to hold Duke without hurting him, but mercifully, the same elderly nurse from before chose that moment to poke her head in.

"I think you should leave," she told Rev after only a moment in the room. Nathan would give it to her; the woman was perceptive.

Rev seemed to decide he'd done enough damage, because he waved to them and turned to leave. "You take care now," he called over his shoulder.

Duke made another lunge for him, but Nathan had a much better grip on him now. He turned Duke away from the door, pulling him into a firm but careful hug. Duke twisted in his arms, but Nathan just held him, cradling his head against his shoulder and stroking his thumb down Duke's neck.

"Shh, just take it easy, babe," Nathan said, and he'd no sooner finished speaking than Duke's leg gave out from under him. Nathan only just managed to catch him and the nurse hurried over to help him as he eased Duke back down on the bed.

Duke was white as a ghost and breathing hard like he'd just run a marathon. His eyes were fixed on the door the nurse had closed only moments before, and Nathan could've sworn he saw tears in them. Duke was too proud to cry in front of the Rev; no matter how much control he lost, he wouldn't go that far.

"Sweetheart, why don't you lie down for a few minutes," the nurse said kindly. She went to push him back, but Duke shrugged her off. His eyes never once left the door, but Nathan noticed they weren't exactly pinpoint focused.

Nathan moved to kneel in front of him, tipping Duke's chin down until he looked at him. "It's okay. He's gone, Duke. He's gone."

"You didn't see…" Duke whispered, a haunted sort of look on his pale face. "You didn't…he was smiling…I thought he was gonna kill her, and I…"

"He didn't, though. You saved her, Duke."

After a moment, Duke nodded hesitantly. Nathan wasn't sure it was because he agreed with him, rather he probably just did it on instinct. "Nate, I don't…" he paused, taking in a breath through his nose and letting it out. "I don't feel so hot."

And then he pitched forward.

"Hey, hey." Nathan rose, catching Duke as he fell and tipping his head back. Duke's eyes were still open, but they had a dazed look to them, and his head kept lilting to the side. "Duke, babe, what's wrong?"

"He's probably about to pass out," the nurse said before Duke got a chance to. "We need to get him lying down."

Nathan nodded, and together with the nurse, they got him straightened back on the bed. Duke automatically tried to sit back up, but Nathan held him back as the nurse disappeared into the bathroom.

"No, just stay down," he told him, brushing a hand through his hair. "You just need to relax now. You're okay."

But Duke kept trying to push himself up onto his elbow. "We're going," he said. "Home. We're going home."

It was almost painfully easy to slip his arm out from under him and ease him back to the bed. "Not right now, babe. Not right now."

Duke let out a soft whine, but this time, he didn't try to get up. Right about then, the nurse emerged from the bathroom with a folded wet towel which she handed to Nathan. He guessed it was cold, but he couldn't have known.

Not until he pressed it to Duke's brow, anyway. His boyfriend flinched when it touched him, but finally he just gave up.

"Let me know if you need anything or when he's ready to get up again."

"Will do," Nathan said. "Thanks." With a nod, the nurse left him alone with Duke. He turned back to his boyfriend, padding the cool cloth over his cheeks and brow. "Feeling any better?" he asked softly.

"'m fine," Duke mumbled. He didn't open his eyes, but he did lean into Nathan's hand as he traced his fingers lightly along Duke's jaw. "I just got worked up's all…still ready to go home."

Nathan chuckled a little at that. Leave it to Duke to be pig-headed and stubborn while he was trying not to faint. "Give it a few minutes, babe, then we'll go, I swear."

Duke opened a single eye, peering at Nathan pointedly. "Pinky swear?" he asked, and the corner of his lip quirked up into the barest hint of a smile.

It was one of the most beautiful things Nathan had ever seen. Smiling, he leaned down and captured Duke's lips in a soft kiss. When they parted, he sat back and hooked his little finger in Duke's.

"Pinky swear."


End file.
